I often get religious nutters complaining about my homosexuality in the form of: "The Bible says it's wrong to be gay, you're a freak who will burn in Hell." My response is to provide an accurate quote: "The Bible says a man must not lie with a man as he lies with a woman, I've never had vaginal sex with a man."

If someone says "You're ugly." I ( Read more... )

A collection of funny quotes, some mind and some borrowed from other places.

"The day is young! Far too young! Us being up this early is practically statutory rape!"

"No, no, no see we're BOTH evil twins. It'll be awesome! We can rain doom and brimstone over all this land... and we can call it... This Land..."

"Freedom is like air, you breathe it in ( Read more... )

 It's that time again ^^

1) I forgot my shoes for PE today, so I spent the entire lesson in just my socks

2) Spent the entire PE lesson walking in a circle

3) Due to lack of shoes and walking I looked like a pilgrim monk

4) Went to the Library for two seperate lessons

5) Found the lyrics for 'Melodies of Life' from FF9

6) Spent a lunch break blowing ( Read more... )

Peach Flan: My little brother was supposed to make flan today in food tech, but he forgot his ingredients so my parents made it instead. Mmm, Peach flan and Vanilla ice-cream :D

Deer: In ICT we were supposed to write a letter to a client. Here are the letters we came up with:

Mine: Dear Sir/Madam. I am writing to inform you that I have shagged your ( Read more... )

So I had my English Lit exam today, it counts towards 20% of my overall grade in the subject, and I scraped through barely. Seriously I had to read the three question for five minutes before I could even decide which one to answer. Also, I missed a huge section I had intended to write about because I ran out of time. I was so tempted to mention the ( Read more... )

Ms Ingle: Does anyone know what the Ed Sullivan show is?
Class: No.
Ms Ingle: It was a show where people would go on an perform music acts or other things they were talented at.
Ashley: *wiggles her eyebrows at me*
Me: *silently snickers* 
Ms Ingle: It was on in the 50's.
Jonny: What was?
Ms Ingle: The Ed Sullivan show.
Jonny: Were you on it miss?
Ms Ingle ( Read more... )

Today was my first day back at school, and the first time my group of friends has been together in over two weeks. Therefore the random was rather frequent, examples below:

Beth: My Mum adopted me a giraffe for Christmas.
Me: Can you go see it at the zoo?
Beth: No it's in the wild.
Luke: I bet it isn't real, I bet they just got an image of a giraffe ( Read more... )

Just have to share this coz it's so random: Niki/Nathan/Ted/Ando= NINTENDO!

Also: Preziron: The anti-depressant that makes you smile when you feel like topping yourself

Also: OMG! WTF? EGG NOG BBQ!?

And finally: Amazing Alison, only $19.95. She has blonde hair, blue eyes, a gucci handbag, a chihuahua, cocaine, stilletto heels AND a mouth that sucks ( Read more... )